life coaching

You get bitter or better

My mom has crystal clear common sense. She's highly observant of human nature and how/why people react and respond the way they do.

One observation that she shared with me as I approached 30 was:

"As people age, some lose their sense of humor. They forget how to laugh, and laugh at their self."

How I put it:

You get bitter or you get better.

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Now that I am in my 30s and I reflect on how we age, how we are taught to deal with/handle our emotions, it's so easy to see why some lose this sense of light-heartedness. The world can be tough, and it strengthens the ego's grip of temporary satiation:

Consumption of anything but digesting your emotions.

Especially if you're dealing with mental illness like depression (as I have), anxiety, or PTSD or anything in between, there's a line between healing and dealing.

Dealing with your emotions may lead you to feeling defeated, disconnected, or the ultimate dead end: apathy or pessimism that "its never going to change."

Healing your emotions and aging gracefully requires participation, a choice in every decision and moment to try and choose more wisely. This means making choices that help you cope and move you forward, like therapy, medicine (anti-depressants are a good thing in the right prescriptive settings), and/or coaching.

Most importantly, the world is filled with gravitas, a weighted, anchor, that can feel like moving forward can't be done. Maybe that's what the powers at be want: to keep us imprisoned from feeling like there's possibility. So, what can you do?

Be brave. Be courageous in your choices and resolve to move forward, identify how your feeling and why, and to stay bright. Be careful not to placate your despair with unchecked positivity -- I am all about being rational as I am about emotional intelligence.

Choosing to look for joy in the impossible is a great act of liberation. It leads to action to inspire and heal yourself and others.

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TO FACE YOUR FEARS, YOU MUST LEARN TO FORGIVE YOURSELF FIRST FOR HAVING THEM.

This means letting go of the shame, guilt, sadness, and anger.

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Rather than #vaguebook, I will share some of what I have been through in the last 5 years (some days it feels like 5 lifetimes of shit):

*Two toxic 9-5 jobs with one that had manipulatively untrue allegations launched against me, and an exec who's micromanagement style caused over 50% of the team to turnover in 1.5 years

*A period of spiritual growth period that left me feeling very alone, shamed and judged. I had to learn some tough lessons including causing irreparable damage to some of my longest relationships. This shift has culled some people out of my life, and it's completely transformed and DEEPLY ENHANCED the relationships in my life.

*A weight loss journey that caused a problem with binge eating and was a diagnosable eating disorder. From which, recovering from this was the greatest form of healing on a physical, emotional, and spiritual level.

*A brain injury where people questioned my chronic illness and resulting depression. It has taken all my faculties to learn kindness and love from within as a result.

After years of deep sadness, hurt, and shadow searching time, I crave light. I spent time in darkness feeling scared that my experiences, my own journey of who I am now, would disconnect me from people. When really, it's the opposite. The heavy emotions you are feeling are normal. And, they're revealing something to you.

You may feel like you're the only one in the world who gets it, and while that's true sometimes, sharing what your feeling and what your needs are is the first step to coming out of the darkness and slaying the fear dragon. You must forgive yourself for feeling "broken" or "damaged". Forgive yourself for the anger, the guilt, and the shame that you are feeling because these are deeper lessons which uncover how bright your Light is and where you keep Love. 

As I have learned through my own Saturn Return and Dark Night of Soul, as well as coached many people through these periods of their life, what's best is to allow yourself to be heard. I listen. I hold space. I help translate these emotions in a language your heart, mind, and soul can understand. As we venture deeper into our conscious awareness of how we show up in the world, we can connect to more of the magic around us. We can dial into our intuition, our strength of sensibilities, and connect more authentically to those around us. 

In this period of time, I can say resolutely that we need more authenticity. More people willing to share what they've learned and what they're going through. The best part? Doing it on your own terms in a space that makes you feel safe. Yes, relationships may evolve, but as you dig deeper into what makes you work, how you feel, you will attract better aligned relationships with people who understand, empathize, and love and support you. This is when abundance happens!

It all starts with forgiveness. 

If you're ready to let go of shame and guilt, and get living life with happiness and joy, let's get on the phone and talk. I always offer complimentary intro sessions to see if how I may be of service to help unstick you in the cycle of shame.

What are Stone Stories?

What are Stone Stories?

As I continue to grow my business offering crystals for the home and healing, I have an overwhelming sense of gratitude to connect special pieces that impact the lives whom the crystals go home with. It is my intention for this blog series, "Stone Story", to reveal an intimate and vulnerable story about an experience I have had with a specific crystal or stone. I believe that, if we pay attention, there are huge miracles and shifts that happen when we knowingly and intentionally let crystals into our personal space.